Thursday, February 05, 2009

How to bow and scrape in the 21st century

John Bergstrom, local car dealer, publishes a letter where he first kowtows to the new administration

The day you were elected was one of the proudest days I have had as an American.  Please accept my apologies for not voting for you. (I was very proud of how John McCain had served our country.)

Then petitions for an economic boon: give everyone who buys a car $5,000 in government vouchers and spare my automobile dealership fiefdom.

You're doing it wrong. 

A proper kowtow involves at least a full paragraph and should allude to how worthless one's opinion is and how abjectly sorry one is for making the wrong choice.  You never mention the wrong choice by name.  You then follow that up with another paragraph expressing hope that the worthless one might be of some small service to the new regime.
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