RAMTHA

Speaking of two tons of crazy in a quarter-ton truck, I present: RAMTHA

Ramtha is the entity that Knight says she channels. According to her, Ramtha was a Lemurian warrior who fought the Atlanteans over 35,000 years ago. She says that Ramtha led an army of over 2.5 million across the continents, conquering two thirds of the known world, which was going through cataclysmic geological changes. According to Knight, Ramtha led the army for ten years until he was betrayed and almost killed.

I guess that makes Ramtha a sort of George Patton? Maybe an Eisenhower or a MacArthur.

Oh, there is more.

She also owns the copyright to Ramtha

You can copyright deity?

and conducts sessions in which she pretends to go into a trance and speaks Hollywood’s version of Elizabethan English in a guttural, husky voice.

Why would a 35,000 year-old warrior - a sort of Patton or MacArthur of his era - speak in Elizabethan English? Maybe he snuck in for a quck visit in in 1503 to acquire the language .. but then he hasn't updated his dialect? This might be evidence that he's not a terribly bright entity.

It's possible he's having us on about conquering the world thing.

At any rate I'm not sure a guy who was born before there were IPods has a whole lotta perspective on the modern era.

And he looked at me and he said: "Beloved woman, I am Ramtha the Enlightened One, and I have come to help you over the ditch" And, well, what would you do? I didn't understand because I am a simple person so I looked to see if the floor was still underneath the chair. And he said: "It is called the ditch of limitation", and he said: "And I am here, and we are going to do a grand work together."*

She omitted the part where Ramtha rolled his eyes and thought for a long minute about finding a new channel who understood obvious metaphor.