Tuesday, October 07, 2008

Joe McFibbin Biden

Joe Biden is somewhat famous for just saying stuff during last week's debate - Kissinger, kicking the Hezbollah out of Lebanon [1] and so forth.

In boot camp you learn a lot of stuff and it's all neatly packaged into sound bites you can spit back when anyone asks.  But what you're told (at least Platoon 3099 was told this) was that sometimes - say when you're being inspected by the Colonel [2] - they're not looking for knowledge so much as confidence.  They were not listening for a correct answer so much as attitude.

I conjecture that Biden has this act nailed down. 

Senator, what's the maximum effective range of your M16? 5,000 miles, Sir!  Senator, what about Hezbollah? Kicked their asses out of Lebanon, Sir!  Senator, is Henry Kissinger your pal?  He's my best friend, Sir!

He's so wrong but he sounds so good and confident that it flies right by you.  Just imagine how well this played before the internet and YouTube?

[1] You gotta think that when Lebanon TV played those comments there was no small amount of chuckling in day rooms all over South Lebanon.

[2] At one point the Colonel came by for a uniform inspection.  For some reason we were behind our sister platoons in PT, drill .. well just about everything.  So there was a lot riding on 3099 looking really good for the Colonel. We did really good - but we were so keyed up and nervous about all this ... well for example one guy from Puerto Rico flat out forgot how to speak English.

Colonel: You likin' boot camp, Private?
Recruit: (choke) .. Si Colonel!

Despite acting like inbred Golden Retrievers we won the uniform inspections handily.  So one sister platoon were top scorers on the range, the other were PT Gods .. but we were the best dressed mob in the series.

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